May 13, 2017

Amor propio

Goodnight:

The day has already passed, it is gone and everything is the same again. We are back in the shadows, hidden as convicts without knowing very well why. Hidden behind the word itself, after the apathy and the unconcern of who has to watch over us, for the sick, for our rights and for the investigation to discover the cause or causes. Here we are recomposing ourselves of the effort that has taken us all the preparations to be able to make ourselves visible in one way or another on the day they make us a little case; The day that already happened

The day has passed and in him we saw information in the local press, on the television, in the streets, in the hospitals, in the demonstrations that were made, in the networks, etc .; But you know what? In day has passed and we have only to be as united as yesterday, we can only continue to fight together, understanding and supporting us, because only this way will be how we get something as collective, Only this way will be like our families in the first place, and then society will be able to understand us and take us seriously.

The day has passed and many of us are suffering the physical consequences of having spent so much time standing, so many hours dedicated to the visibility of our disease, so many times of preparation, agreements and disagreements, encounters and disagreements; In short, to live life itself but in fibromyalgic bodies and minds.

The day has passed and still today I am physically impaired. I had to sleep after getting up for breakfast; I had the need to lie down after lunch; I have needed to come to bed already because my body is absolutely resentful. My neck can not move well and my head weighs too much on it. It is an effort to keep my eyes open because they hurt me a lot and I have them very dry; My swollen hands do not let me take things safely so I have to pay more attention so that they do not fall to me, which makes me exhausted before; The legs are still swollen and with much pain, until the legs of Manchitas touching them make me feel a totally exacerbated pain; The headache does not let me concentrate as I would like and I am not able to follow the familiar conversations.

The day has passed and there are still bruises on my body that have been in my body for months; Bruises that I have forgotten even how I have done them but that have made my body their private home. I continue with the problems to lose the weight that I have gained in these months and will not be for not eating healthy. My ankles burn and my knees are spent the day complaining about the pain they feel. It hurts to raise my arms and it becomes a risky sport to do it with some weight on my hands. That is our day to day, our life the rest of our life; That is the way we have to live since fibromyalgia settled in our lives leaving us the faint memory of who we were.

The day has passed and I understand, better, that I must leave behind who I was to accept and love who I am. I must be aware that life continues and I feel proud of myself and of what I do, accept and love myself because I deserve all this and more of myself; Because if I do not love myself, I will not be able to give anything good to others, but I love myself, I begin to understand and accept, so the day has passed but I will go forward in the best way I know, handing out my love to whoever wants to accept it and understand; Giving me as a person the people who want to be to join and with those who accept me with flaws and virtues.

Thanks for reading, I send kisses and hugs of cotton begging them to share to reach more people.

María Díaz.